Loss

I usually don’t share personal things online but I have learned that healing comes in many ways. I hope by sharing my experiences that I can help others dealing with similar loss.

Yesterday, at 15 weeks, I went to the OB and learned the genders of my two babies. A fraternal boy and girl pair.

Sadly I also learned that my baby boy did not make it through the week. This is the 3rd baby I have lost since Dan and I were married in 2006. We do not yet have any living children. The baby girl is still ok.

Jeremy Camp

There Will Be A Day Lyrics

“I try to hold on with everything I have

But I feel the weight of what it brings, and the hurt that tries to grab

The many trials that seem to never end, His word declares this truth

That we will enter in this rest with wonders anew

I hold on to this hope and the promise that He brings

That there will be a place with no more suffering

There will be a day with no more tears

No more pain, and no more fears

There will be a day when the burdens of this place

Will be no more, we'll see Jesus face to face

But until that day, we'll hold on

I know the journey seems so long

[we] feel [we]’re walking on [our] own

But there has never been a step

Where [we’ve] walked alone

Troubled soul don’t lose your heart

Joy and peace he brings

And the beauty that’s in store

Outweighs the hurt of life’s sting

But I hold on to this hope and the promise that He brings

That there will be a place with no more suffering

There will be a day with no more tears

No more pain, and no more fears

There will be a day when the burdens of this place

Will be no more, we'll see Jesus face to face

But until that day, we'll hold on

I can’t wait until that day where the very one

I’ve lived for always will wipe away the sorrow that I’ve faced

To [heal] the scars from a life of shame and misery

O, this is why, this is why I sing

There will be a day with no more tears

No more pain, and no more fears

There will be a day when the burdens of this place

Will be no more, we'll see Jesus face to face

There will be a day he will wipe away the tears

He will wipe away the tears

He will wipe away the tears

Girls Camp Countdown begins… 7 days

Now that I’m starting to feel better at 15 weeks, I can concentrate on my Stake Girls Camp calling. I have been way behind because all I wanted to do was lay down and drink ginger ale haha. But I am so happy.

This year our theme is IRON Young Women Hold to the Rod. We are focusing on Lehi’s dream and the Tree of Life. We are so excited! We’re doing High Cope, a Tree of Life experience complete with a lit up Tree, as well as tons of fun activities like water fights, Tomahawk competitions, canoe races, and ward impromptu skits.

Since this is my last year as the Fort Lauderdale Stake Camp Director, I plan on making it the best yet, despite the fact that I feel so pregnant.

Speaking of being pregnant, they say with twins you’re body grows faster/feels more intense and you feel like you’re farther along than you really are. Dan says even though I’m only 15 weeks, 3 1/2 months, I look much farther. We’ll see what the OB says today! :D

Diary of a pregnant woman’s husband…

 

For those of you who may have missed our big announcement, Audrey is pregnant…

with twins!

So it is incumbent upon me to keep up the blog, as Audrey’s time is now largely spent between eating and being nauseous.  Any time she has left over is spent preparing for girls’ camp. 

One of Audrey’s friends told her that a woman’s brain shrinks during pregnancy, then returns to normal afterwards.  I told Audrey that can’t be true, as your brain really can’t increase in size after about age 2.

While there may or may not be any truth to it, Audrey has definitely started to say and do some odd things lately.  I’ll spare her the embarrassment of any specific stories, but it’s fun to watch her go red.

For those who are interested in minor details instead of fun embarrassing stories, the babies are due in August and we will be finding out the genders in a little over a month. 

More to follow!

Rodeo

Yee Haw!! Hey Ya’ll!!

Dan and I at his first concert! Can you believe it? A country concert by Gretchen Wilson… haha

 

Country Rock. I could get used to this…

Well since Dan and I live in Davie, FL, the South Florida center of all things rodeo, we decided to join up. We went to our 1st rodeo together.

Dan laughed so hard as I screamed at the men riding the bucking broncos. I thought they were gonna die! geez

It was fun. I loved the country music and the food. But not so much the cold (it got down to the 50’s) or the smells haha.

I am 28…

Hi everyone 

so shocker! we took pics of my birthday! Dan really did make it great for me. He somehow bought me balloons without me knowing- which if you know me it's super hard to surprise me.

He made me a home-made velvet cake, helped me buy some new snazzy running shoes, and made me a special breakfast and dinner. How cute is that? :D

Here's a pic of my new shoes! I went running this morning. LOVE THEM LOVE THEM! It's like running on air. Thanks Dan!

Experience the real Florida keys…

So now it was my turn to teach Dan something new again.. we headed down to the FL keys and I took Dan snorkeling in the ‘big blue’ for his first time ever!

We spent 2 days in Key Largo’s John Pennekamp State Park. The FL Keys is the world’s 3rd largest coral reef, absolutely gorgeous and so unique!

Dan said he didn’t realize snorkeling was so easy, the flippers esp. help make it easy! You just float around, kick to go somewhere and follow amazingly cool fish as they eat coral and swim.

We saw 2-3 feet parrot fish, blue french angel fish, and the blue “Dorie” fish off Finding Nemo. We saw five 3-4 feet barracuda, giant lobsters, and many other schools of fish. It was such a cool feeling swimming into a school of fish- feeling their currents around you, watching them systematically divert their swimming patterns around you like music.

We also went snorkeling at the State Park beaches where they have old Spanish canons. It’s good practice cuz it’s way shallow at parts but deep enough to dive if you want and practice before going out into the ocean. ;)

Do you see the lobster?

Afterwards we went to Key West with my parents. My mom’s posted all the historical sites we visited. But we also went snorkeling again at Higg’s beach in Key West along the pier. And I saw a Lion Fish. Whew! It looked like a sea urchin so I got about 1 foot away to get a better view. It was upside down and side ways eating the coral, as it turned around and faced me it was about 1 foot long, then add its poisonous spines… And no I didn’t get a picture because I was busy screaming and backing up as fast as I could. My dad and Dan heard him and came over. My dad did the same thing I did- got close enough to tell what it was and backed up, yelling haha. We had a blast!

Next snorkel adventure is Bahia Honda State Park! Wanna come?

Just a boy and a girl in a leaky canoe…

Have you heard the camp song above? Well dan, I and my parents experienced what this song feels like a few weeks ago. Dan and I enjoy teaching each other new things, so since I taught him/got him to go white water rafting, he’s been teaching me how to canoe. So we decided to go canoeing in Jupiter, FL and invited my parents to come along- lonely empty nesters you know…

We had a great time till we realized that my parents’ canoe was leaking… whoops! :( Here’s a pic of dan and dad dumping the water out.) So we tried to make the best of it and switched canoes with my parents after we had already paddled 2 miles down the river.

It was so peaceful and beautiful. It is Florida’s wet season so the man-made waterfalls on this river were flooded so that was lame but we enjoyed the rustic nature of the river complete with fallen trees, bridges and other obstacles.

Another time when we were emptying the water out of the 2nd canoe, Dan and I decided to climb out on a fallen tree to have a picture taken… well what do you think happened? Take a look…

That’s right.. we decided to jump in haha!  no…

Of course I lost my balance and knocked Dan in with me, but it was way fun. Too bad mom was too far away for me to pull in too… And of course dad got it all on camera. thanks dad ;p