Loss

I usually don’t share personal things online but I have learned that healing comes in many ways. I hope by sharing my experiences that I can help others dealing with similar loss.

Yesterday, at 15 weeks, I went to the OB and learned the genders of my two babies. A fraternal boy and girl pair.

Sadly I also learned that my baby boy did not make it through the week. This is the 3rd baby I have lost since Dan and I were married in 2006. We do not yet have any living children. The baby girl is still ok.

Jeremy Camp

There Will Be A Day Lyrics

“I try to hold on with everything I have

But I feel the weight of what it brings, and the hurt that tries to grab

The many trials that seem to never end, His word declares this truth

That we will enter in this rest with wonders anew

I hold on to this hope and the promise that He brings

That there will be a place with no more suffering

There will be a day with no more tears

No more pain, and no more fears

There will be a day when the burdens of this place

Will be no more, we'll see Jesus face to face

But until that day, we'll hold on

I know the journey seems so long

[we] feel [we]’re walking on [our] own

But there has never been a step

Where [we’ve] walked alone

Troubled soul don’t lose your heart

Joy and peace he brings

And the beauty that’s in store

Outweighs the hurt of life’s sting

But I hold on to this hope and the promise that He brings

That there will be a place with no more suffering

There will be a day with no more tears

No more pain, and no more fears

There will be a day when the burdens of this place

Will be no more, we'll see Jesus face to face

But until that day, we'll hold on

I can’t wait until that day where the very one

I’ve lived for always will wipe away the sorrow that I’ve faced

To [heal] the scars from a life of shame and misery

O, this is why, this is why I sing

There will be a day with no more tears

No more pain, and no more fears

There will be a day when the burdens of this place

Will be no more, we'll see Jesus face to face

There will be a day he will wipe away the tears

He will wipe away the tears

He will wipe away the tears

Girls Camp Countdown begins… 7 days

Now that I’m starting to feel better at 15 weeks, I can concentrate on my Stake Girls Camp calling. I have been way behind because all I wanted to do was lay down and drink ginger ale haha. But I am so happy.

This year our theme is IRON Young Women Hold to the Rod. We are focusing on Lehi’s dream and the Tree of Life. We are so excited! We’re doing High Cope, a Tree of Life experience complete with a lit up Tree, as well as tons of fun activities like water fights, Tomahawk competitions, canoe races, and ward impromptu skits.

Since this is my last year as the Fort Lauderdale Stake Camp Director, I plan on making it the best yet, despite the fact that I feel so pregnant.

Speaking of being pregnant, they say with twins you’re body grows faster/feels more intense and you feel like you’re farther along than you really are. Dan says even though I’m only 15 weeks, 3 1/2 months, I look much farther. We’ll see what the OB says today! :D

Diary of a pregnant woman’s husband…

 

For those of you who may have missed our big announcement, Audrey is pregnant…

with twins!

So it is incumbent upon me to keep up the blog, as Audrey’s time is now largely spent between eating and being nauseous.  Any time she has left over is spent preparing for girls’ camp. 

One of Audrey’s friends told her that a woman’s brain shrinks during pregnancy, then returns to normal afterwards.  I told Audrey that can’t be true, as your brain really can’t increase in size after about age 2.

While there may or may not be any truth to it, Audrey has definitely started to say and do some odd things lately.  I’ll spare her the embarrassment of any specific stories, but it’s fun to watch her go red.

For those who are interested in minor details instead of fun embarrassing stories, the babies are due in August and we will be finding out the genders in a little over a month. 

More to follow!